If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
