After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
