dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
