2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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