Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
