Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
