your room smells of hookers.
And success
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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