scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
His hands were made for my vagina.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least đ
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing âHappy Birthdayâ to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, âWhy didnât you sing along?!?â I responded, âI donât know him. I donât give a shit if he has a happy birthday.â
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