this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
