They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
