Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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