we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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