Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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