I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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