My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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