so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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