why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
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