its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
