Me. At least after what I've been through.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
