A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
