I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
