you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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