with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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