I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Couch. On fire.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
