I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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