booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
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