Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
