Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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