distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Randomize
