All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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