Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
