Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
love makes seman taste better
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
