HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Randomize
