She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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