just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
