we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Dignity is for republicans.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
How does one acquire holy water?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Randomize
