we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
