he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
