Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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