WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
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