you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
