i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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