People with herpes should wear stickers.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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