even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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