So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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