Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
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