I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
