hotel room ftw
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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