I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Boobs are out for the taking
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize