If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
