he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
